"We need to listen to our feelings but decide with our minds."
Dialoguing is a method for asking questions to help make good decisions. From there, we can more accurately weigh the different courses of action.
Imagine the dialogue as being like an old-fashioned scale on which we place the opposing points of view in order to sense which side has greater weight. Both Socrates and Ben Franklin used this method to reach good decisions. After you dialogue, stop and weigh the sides, like a judge weighing which side seems to have the greater validity. State it as a tentative go/no go ratio, such as a 60/40, 90/10 or 51/49. It's never 50/50 if you go deep enough.
After you weigh the two sides and estimate your percentage ratio, then ask, "What else should I take into account or give more weight to in a decision?" Then continue on in your dialogue, considering these factors, until you feel you've covered the most important points. Then review what you've written and estimate what your cumulative bottom line go/no go ratio or decision is. Once you look at all levels and weigh the percentages, then go with the odds.
Question marks are hook-shaped tools that draw up from our subconscious mind what we need to assist us. But it's only when we slow down and listen that the subconscious has a chance to release its suggestions for how to react.
Dialoguing and coming to a Bottom Line Ratio helps us recognize that there are valid arguments on both sides of an issue, but we have to make a choice. It helps us be able to get in rational control of our more emotional parts.
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